Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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