so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
