I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
