This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
