You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
