Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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