Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
