Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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