My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
