nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
