He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
