when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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