Rock
Scissors
Fuck
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
