i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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