So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
