I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
