just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
tell me about the eggs
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