About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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