I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
