I hate your face
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
