Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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