I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
