C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
