im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
