i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
