amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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