Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Randomize
