I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
