It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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