there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
