I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
