The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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