i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Randomize
