That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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