She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
