She's JV to your varsity
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize