When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize