she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
