My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
