This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
it glows. i had to have it.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
