I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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