All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
