Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Randomize
