Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize