Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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