Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
