I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
