So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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