wakey wakey hands off snakey
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
