Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
