Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
