Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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